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While there are some, who claim India is intolerant towards minorities, a Muslim woman who claims to live in Sweden claimed that Indians Muslims were much better off. Her bio says: "Hello there, everyone. My name is Aisha. I'm from Saudi Arabia and I'm currently living in Sweden. I am a geek and I love reading, which is my favourite hobby.

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SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: Best Tips On How To Make Your Boyfriend Happy

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I once had a graduate student who said that computers were possessed. I think about her every time my computer behaves completely bizarrely. Sometimes I think blog posts are possessed, too. Some of them seem to come back from the dead years after I publish them. Seemingly out of the blue, people will be reading them, pinging them, and tweeting them.

Now another two years have passed, and there has been a resurgence of pings and such back to the post in just the last few weeks. This year, , has been a banner year for toppling the myth that people who marry have better health than they had when they were single.

I try to maintain an updated list of all my myth-busting writings here on my personal website. In , a group of authors analyzed the results of 18 long-term studies of the implications of getting married for happiness.

They wanted to know whether getting married makes people lastingly happier. The answer was no. This article is going to be longer than usual, because I want to be very clear about what is wrong with the arguments that getting married makes you happier or healthier or live longer or have better sex or anything else.

In all 18 studies, the researchers began asking people about their well-being happiness, life satisfaction, or satisfaction with their relationship partner before they got married and continued asking them the same questions for some time afterwards. They found no evidence that getting married results in lasting increases in happiness or life satisfaction or satisfaction with the relationship.

A few things made the results especially striking. First, the design of at least half of the studies and maybe as many as 16 of the 18 was biased in favor of showing positive implications of getting married.

If you want to know whether getting married will make you happier, you need to look at all of the people who got married, and not just those who got married and stayed married. If you are thinking of marrying, you have no way of knowing for sure if you will end up staying married. The second remarkable thing about the findings is that there was only one hint, on only one of the three measures, that getting married produced any improvement in well-being.

Right around the time of the wedding, people reported somewhat greater life satisfaction. However, that was just a honeymoon effect, and over time, it wore off. Over time, married people ended up no more satisfied with their life than they were when they were single. With regard to happiness and satisfaction with your partner, there was not even a honeymoon effect. Happiness did not change. On the average, satisfaction with your relationship was actually worse just after the wedding than just before, and it kept going downhill in the subsequent years.

That should have put an end to all the mythology about how getting married makes you happier and more satisfied. In the new study probably one of the original 18, reanalyzed , the authors looked only at life satisfaction and found the same thing as before. In analyses of just those people who got married and stayed married, there was a brief honeymoon effect around the time of the wedding. Then the married people ended up just as satisfied or dissatisfied as they were when they were single.

First, they looked at normative changes in life satisfaction over the course of the adult years. Setting aside considerations of marital status, the study showed as have other studies that life satisfaction decreases over time. Then they looked specifically at the people who stayed single, and found that their life satisfaction showed some decrease over time.

From that, they tried to make the argument that if the people who had gotten married and stayed married had instead stayed single, they would have been less happy. As I described previously, other people — including social scientists who should know better — seem to be using the results as evidence that if you get married, you will become happier. Findings suggest that they are generally not happier than people who stay single.

See, for example, pp. On the average, their happiness does not begin to increase again until sometime after the divorce. The authors are comparing the people who married and stayed married to those who stay single. They are saying that if the stay-married people had never married at all, their happiness would have been the same as that of people who stayed single. So, over time, lower by less than one-third of one point on a 7-point scale. Remember, this is what we are talking about here:.

But the stay-married people and the stay-single people are different people. They may have different motivations, different values, different interests. Let me start with the people who stayed single. As I noted previously, Harvard professor and Stumbling on Happiness author Dan Gilbert is telling audiences that if they get married, they will get happier.

Consider that some of the single people who stay single are single-at-heart. People who are single-at-heart love their solitude. They are not all that interested in a long-term romantic partner. Among those who have been in relationships that ended, their primary reaction to the break-up was more often relief than sadness or pain.

They like handling challenges mostly on their own. Do you really think that if such people got married, they would be happier? And nothing in the study I have been describing indicates otherwise. Now consider those who got married and stayed married. True, they ended up. Maybe the kind of people who get married and stay married are people who maintain a certain level of happiness no matter what.

Maybe they would have been just as happy if they had stayed single. Maybe for some people, marriage really does matter. Maybe it matters in different ways for different kinds of people. For others perhaps the single-at-heart , they live their happiest lives when single. If they got married, they would end up less happy than they would if they had stayed single.

For still another group of people, marriage just might not matter at all. They have a certain level of happiness, and getting married or staying single has nothing to do with it. With regard to their happiness or satisfaction, they are who they are.

The singles were older than the married people, and remember that in that sample, the older people were less happy than the younger ones. Even more importantly, the authors did not match the single and married people on other characteristics that could have mattered, such as all the ways in which people who are single-at-heart and stay single probably differ from people who get married and stay married.

Even setting aside the single-at-heart arguments, it simply is not possible to match single and married people so that the only way they differ is in their marital status. Lots of extras come with the official status of being married, that are not a necessary or inherent part of the marital package. American policymakers chose to shower married people with more than 1, perks and protections that are not afforded to single people.

The United States and many other countries is still filled with matrimaniacs who glorify marriage and married people, and stigmatize people who are single. What if single people had the same legal and economic advantages that married people do, and were equally respected?

The combined results of 18 long-term studies showed that getting married did not make people any happier and that satisfaction with the relationship actually decreased over time.

The only hint of a benefit was a brief increase in life satisfaction around the time of the wedding, which soon went away. All of these failures to find that getting married makes you happier came from a set of studies biased in favor of making marriage look better than it really is.

In a subsequent study that made the bias even stronger by definitively including in the married group only those who got married and stayed married, that group of people who got married and stayed married still did not report any greater life satisfaction over the long run than they had experienced when they were single.

And even with all of the ways in which the study was biased to favor the conclusion that getting married will make you happier, the best they could do was find a difference in happiness of less than a third of a point on a 7-point scale.

What would have happened if they included all of the people who ever married in the marriage group? Probably even that small difference would disappear. In this article, I have focused on the implications of marrying for happiness. The methodological points I am making, though, are equally relevant to studies of getting married and getting healthier, having more or better sex, living longer, and everything else.

The marriage-addled scientists and writers and pundits just keep on perpetrating the myth that getting married magically transforms sad singles into blissful couples. Photo by neajjean. Bella DePaulo Ph. DePaulo is in her sixties. She has always been single and always will be. She is "single at heart" -- single is how she lives her best and most meaningful life. Visit her website at www. Or via RSS Feed.

Find help or get online counseling now. Single at Heart About the Blog Archives. By Bella DePaulo, Ph. And now here is the original blog post.

Results of 18 Long-Term Studies In all 18 studies, the researchers began asking people about their well-being happiness, life satisfaction, or satisfaction with their relationship partner before they got married and continued asking them the same questions for some time afterwards.

Trying Again to Make the Case for Getting Married and Getting Happier In the new study probably one of the original 18, reanalyzed , the authors looked only at life satisfaction and found the same thing as before.

So how did the authors find a way to make getting married look like a boon to happiness? Here are some of the specifics. The authors tried to match each person in the got-married-and-stayed-married group to a similar person who had stayed single. Specifically, they tried to find a single person who was as similar as possible in age, sex, education and income.

The matching was not totally successful. For example, the single people, on the average, were four years older than those who got married and stayed married.

22 Principles to not fuck up your Dating and your emotional sanity

I once had a graduate student who said that computers were possessed. I think about her every time my computer behaves completely bizarrely. Sometimes I think blog posts are possessed, too.

When I was younger, and a relationship ended, I would do this thing. It was a small gesture that hinted at a better tomorrow. That usually comes later.

Make a nest for love and it always settles. Make a home for the beloved and he will find his way there. A healthy approach to relationships begins from self-awareness. Here are 22 bites of wisdom to help you navigate the tricky space of dating and relationships.

How Many Married Couples Are Truly Happy? Here’s the Accurate Answer Readers Are Embracing

If this is your first time registering, please check your inbox for more information about the benefits of your Forbes account and what you can do next! What are some less common somatic symptoms of depression? Answer by Mike Leary , psychotherapist in private practice, on Quora :. Many people know of depression from experiencing it themselves or seeing friends or coworkers struggle with lethargy, trouble concentrating, and chronic fatigue. It's this low mood over a long period of time most people identify as depression. Commercials for antidepressants usually show a disheveled, tearful person huddled in their bathrobe or hunched over the kitchen table staring into space unable to work or face the day. The CDC says 6. But depression comes in many forms and displays a wide range of symptoms depending on the type, the duration, severity, and the precipitating cause. If your behavior and mood match the stereotypical idea, you may self-diagnose or seek relief from a physician or therapist. But what if your most prevalent change is a loss of libido or being short-tempered or doubting your memory and problem solving abilities?

When People Look Back on Their Lives, What Are Some Common Regrets They Have?

Updated: April 23, Reader-Approved References. Whether you've been married for only a year or you're approaching your twenty-fifth wedding anniversary, you must have learned one basic fact: if your wife's not happy, then nobody's happy. Keeping your wife happy is the secret to a happy life, and if you want to do it, you have to work on your communication skills, keep your romance alive, and understand your woman's needs. If you want to know how to keep your wife happy, just follow these steps. They may help you out and give you a better chance in your relationship.

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We love Quora. When a user admitted to struggling with missing someone 8 months after the breakup :. When a user asked why people in love get divorced anyway :.

Is it true that the emperor of the Tang Dynasty does not mean this? Now that the situation is stronger than people, he also asked Datang to return to the city. It is not recommended for people who already have illnesses that make it hard for their wounds to heal like HIVAIDS or diabetes to take horny goat weed for long periods of time. Ying Chengfengs heart moved. After it was brought out of the heterosexual space by the old Alfat, its mental state was extremely weak, just like a person who was recovering from a serious illness , Cant see a trace of healthy performance in any way. In order to protect himself, the minister had to use some means to deceive After the emperor, please convict the emperor Lets hear it!

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What if I never get over him (or her) – you asked Google, here’s the answer

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Comments: 2
  1. Moogubar

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  2. Kanris

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